Fast emacs?

[kj]

For ***years*** I've been looking for a solution to this problem,
and I'm truly amazed that I have yet to find it: how to get a
fast-starting version of emacs.  The problem is that I have a big
.emacs file and a big Emacs desktop, which means that my Emacs takes
forever to start.  This is fine most of the time, but occasionally
I want a fast-starting emacs session (e.g. when I run "sudo emacs"
to edit a superuser-owned config file), and it's infuriating to
wait for emacs to go through a lengthy and useless song-and-dance...

I just can't believe there is no way around this.  (Other than, of
course, using vi.)

Note that using the emacsclient is no solution, because this requires
that a version of Emacs be already running, which often defeats
the purpose (not only do I have to wait another eternity for this
new Emacs session to start, but then I have to start the server in
the new session).

Any words of wisdom would be much appreciated!

TIA!

Kynn
-- 
NOTE: In my address everything before the first period is backwards;
and the last period, and everything after it, should be discarded.